Assertiveness for Earth Angels: How to Be Loving Instead of "Too Nice"

I absolutely love Doreen Virtue and I've never met a Hayhouse book I haven't liked. As a recovering people pleaser, Assertiveness for Earth Angels: How to be Loving Instead of "Too Nice" by Doreen Virtue was the perfect choice as my latest read. This one actually screamed out to me.Doreen describes Earth Angels as highly sensitive people with an innocence regarding love and life, believing in God's loving power, gentle, caring, seeing the best in others, trusting, optimistic and more. She digs deep into the many pitfalls of being such a sensitive being, and how to learn to be assertive without being aggressive.For as far back as I can remember, I have found myself giving too much, and yet still feeling like it was not enough. I always had high expectations for what I needed to do for others, but never held anyone to that impossible standard. I even helped people who were quite capable of helping themselves. After reading Doreen's book, I learned that my jumping in to try and "save" them didn't really do them any favors. They have their own path, and their own lessons to learn. I also learned that giving for the wrong reasons can cause resentment, fatigue, money issues, health issues and more. Pure giving, she teaches, is not out of guilt, feeling sorry or obligation.She discusses how to set healthy boundaries, how to handle professional victims, gossipers, martyrs, guilt trippers, toxic relationships, narcissists and sociopaths (who tend to take advantage of kind, giving people).I was an extremely sensitive and quiet child. Although I was often bullied, it was always easier to stand up for others. I could feel their pain and I didn't want them to suffer. I remember my college years and so enjoying going out with my friends. But I also remember not liking large crowds. Trust me, we had lots of fun together, but I also remember feeling drained (not from my dear friends, just the crowd around us) and needing time by myself too. I honestly felt weird for that. Now at 48, I am more sensitive than ever. I absorb everyone's energy, whether positive or negative. It wears on me. I didn't realize that is what was happening to me, until I read Doreen's book. I thought that I wasn't a strong enough person to have my own thoughts and feelings. I felt weak. That's not what it is. I'm empathic. Picking up on the feelings of my classmates when I was a child, was because I truly could feel what they were feeling. Needing quiet time through my college years (and now too), was because the energy I was picking up was exhausting me. I feel very grateful to Doreen that I can now feel compassion towards myself for who I am, instead of criticism. There are so many ways to look at a situation, and more and more I am taking the positive view. That is what is so wonderful about reading books like this, you can find who you really are, and let go of that negative voice.Doreen shows how how to enjoy life instead of people pleasing. She talks about following your passion and shows how we can use delay tactics instead of working on our life purpose by overeating, compulsive shopping, addictive internet surfing, substance abuse and more.She shows us how to shield ourselves from harsh energies with crystals, angel lights, clearing, grounding and trees (yes, go hug a tree, it heals!). Also, you will learn how to have more time and energy by exercising, stretching and releasing, and eating healthfully.There is so much wonderful information packed into this book, and what I love about Doreen, is that she is honest and caring. She guides us to be truthful with ourselves about our real intentions, and provides so many tools to live an authentic, positive, peaceful and purposeful life.As you can probably tell by now, I highly recommend this book.In Gratitude,Kerri Mulhern

I am not going to go around and call myself an Earth Angel. I do not know if I am blessed to be such a virtuous creature, but one thing's for sure, is that I embody all of their personality traits: Extremely sensitive, emotional, loves to take care of others to the point of ignoring their own wants and needs, and as gentle as the first early morning of Spring. Growing up, I was taught, harshly so, to never talk back, to sit down and look at my shoes, that I do not have an opinion, lest I wanted to be punished. I was very fearful of authority figures, always one to help them and to do what they ask without question. The worst part, is that this fear took over with my peers, such as classmates, fair weather "friends", and romantic partners. I was always so anxious to please, always wanting to fit in, but I never succeeded. My self esteem was very low for the longest time. All of my memories with socializing with others, is that I always did more than the other person, and the other person always walked away from me anyway. I felt so alone, so unloved, wondering if I was a celestial extraterristeral from outer space, if one day, I can somehow go back home, wherever that home was.Finally, at age 24, I brought this book, after a spiritual experience that I do not feel comfortable sharing at this time. It was then, I realized, that all of my problems, from lacking a backbone, the fear of saying "no" to others, feeling very lowly of myself, and always ending up in the same toxic relationship with others. This book, ever so gently, slapped me across the face and woke me up from the madness. This book taught me, that yes, it is possible to be kind, loving, and caring, without letting the other person step all over me. That it's okay to say no when I am uncomfortable. That I do not need to feel sick to my stomach, or fear for my life, when strange men try to catcall me and pull on my feathers to laugh as I bleed. To know the patterns of a toxic individual, and to let them go if they refuse to change. (Your gut feeling is EVERYTHING. It is there for a reason, especially if you are an Earth Angel. If you receive negative vibes from someone, if you feel scared, or feel your energy darken when they're around, STAY AWAY FROM THEM, please!)I no longer apologize for my existence. I no longer feel ashamed of who I am. I stand a little straighter, look at people in the eye more fearlessly, and other people see this and they respect me all the more. I no longer feel the need to people please, and if someone doesn't like me, oh well, too bad, so sad! I no longer feel shy around people; this book teaches me that I am at one with others, that we are all equal, even if the other person is a famous celebrity or a threatening authority figure... deep down, we're all the same. That really helped me to no longer coward in front of others. I could say more about this beautiful book, but please, if you are a very sensitive individual who feels like a freak of nature... please get this book. Whether or not you are an Earth Angel, this book has healed me and will heal others who have been abused by others for so long. You are worthy in this world, you are a child of the trees, and you have every right to be here.

WOW! I had a brand new copy of this when it was first released but I lent it to a friend who lost it in her hoard before she had the chance to read it😭 I think this is a helpful guide for ANYBODY (not just Earth Angels) who need to learn and practice effective assertiveness skills, in other words, don't let the words “Earth Angels” mislead you, it's for anybody. I study psychology/counseling and the suggestions in this book parallel skills that are taught to the more “timid” people out there that need to learn how to speak for themselves, ask for what he or she needs, and to just say “NO” to requests that he or she is asked to do, Whether is something they don't want to do or just plain CAN’T. I am selfishly disappointed that Doreen decided to follow another path, a path of a religion that states in it's book that you are sinning if you are a fortune-teller or of alternate beliefs or a spirituality that allow a person to explore other means of exploring other ways of belief.The seller shipped this book shortly after payment and I received it sooner than expected. The condition of the book is immaculate! It's better than brand new because it originally came from a library, and I don't think anybody ever opened it, let alone read it. The covers or laminated, I assume by the library it came from. There are no marks showing that it was a library book except for a tiny stamp.

I wish I had this book years ago - it would have saved me from a lot of heartache. Beautifully and expertly written, full of common sense advice and loving encouragement in equal measure. This is a must-have for anyone who has a tendency to put others' welfare above their own all the time and to the detriment of their own health and happiness. The key, of course, is balance. Life is not all give or all take, but both. This is for people who struggle to say 'no' and it is priceless.

Amazing book ...i read it and see me in the text so many times....it gives you courage to realise ....you are not a selfish person if you need to hold back from people who are just emotionally draining you ...no matter how much you like or love them ....I have been ,like this all my life .....always concerned about others and i still am ....I am just learning that if I give too much then as they say ...something's got to give .....and my mental health is very important .....I love this book and will often read it to reaffirm the messages that Doreen is giving so clearly .....

It’s a bit like read one, know all. This is the third book I read by Doreen Virtue and I believe they are all too similar. Too many words for the same conclusion. Not very happy about it. It’s boring and too repetitive

I like Doreen's energy, you can feel it reading this book. She wants to help everyone, reminding us that everything what we need is inside us. Just, we have to pay attention how we feel, to listen what God and his Angels are telling us through our feelings. And advices that she gives, are very easy to take and very easy to do, when you open your mind. Thank you dearest Doreen for being so unselfish and sharing your knowledge with us,xxx

This is one of the best books on this subject I have ever read and I read up to four books a week. There is maybe nothing in the book you do not already know on some level but the benefit of this book is that it is all laid out clearly and concisely. When we are confused it is hard to think straight and it is so helpful to have a book like this as a tool for directional thinking. Highly recommended