Punk Land Paperback – Illustrated, September 28, 2005

Some of it didn't make sense. But it was humorous and bizarro and each page offers something unexpected, even it if doesn't always make sense.

Carlton Mellick III is a very entertaining author, taking the base of the horror genre and twisting it with satire, adding healthy portions of belly laughs, and some of the grossest scenarios worthy of Edward Lee.'Punk Land' is about a man once named Cal Corncob who dies and goes to heaven, where his new name is Goblin. Unfortunately, entering heaven causes massive deformities. Goblin had been a quiet man with an abnormal dild0 fetish, collecting them for display on his ping-pong table. He didn't use them except for his obsessive/compulsive disorder of throwing them at people, which he cannot control in heaven either.From regular heaven, Goblin travels to a new, recently developed corner of the divine afterlife called Punk Land, created by and presided over by Sid Vicious. Goblin still has few friends, even in heaven, but when Punk Land begins to deteriorate, Goblin meets Shark Girl, Nan, and Mortician. Too many strange rules are popping up on the entry-forms for Punk Land, and its up to Goblin and Shark Girl to get to the bottom of the clean-cut mess and return Punk Land to its anarchistic ways.The book is sprinkled with some very hilarious cartoons, drawings, pictures, lists, and tidbits of information, like what can and cannot be done with the Robot Strippers. Check out the back of the book for information on beautiful cover model Darenzia.Mellick is the master of horror satire and parody. Although I prefer his other works, like 'Ocean Of Lard', 'Sea Of Patchwork Cats', and 'The Menstruating Mall', 'Punk Land' is still a great, light read if you want something squishy and disgusting in a tongue-in-cheek tale. Enjoy!

Imagine a place which exists somewhere between Heaven and hell, a land where punks have erected their own afterlife rather than try to get along in Heaven. Goblin is a guard who works at the main gate of Punk Land, and yet, no one has visited the security station or entered Punk Land in some time. So Goblin is surprised to find two people who arrive not through the gate, but from within Punk Land itself. And they have many more shocking revelations which Goblin decides must be put before the Punk Council.During the trip through Punk Land, Goblin begins to understand that something has gone horribly wrong, and instead of anarchy, Punk Land is being ruled by corporate goons.Then with the entry of Shark Girl into the story, the real horror show begins. Between Shark Girl and the actions of the Punk Council, this book makes the afterlife seem very unpleasant. Because once you accept that you can feel pain in the afterlife, the concept of being eternally shredded on a giant metal grater is pretty gruesome. And this is just one of the nasty surprises waiting for you in this book. If you're looking for a good Bizarro book with a lot of gore and laughs in equal portions, I'd recommend this book.

This loose follow-up to "Satan Burger" brings back Nan and Mortician, along with many new characters, including Goblin, Shark Girl, and GG Allin, just to name a few. It centers around the idea of a heaven for the punk community, which was touched upon in "Satan Burger."I really liked this book, but honestly I preferred "Satan Burger." The ending of this book was a little disappointing and didn't really fit the bizarro, f***ed up sense of absurdity that I was hoping for. Don't get me wrong, I really liked it. I just thought that "Satan Burger" was better.You don't have to read "Satan Burger" first to read "Punk Land" and understand or enjoy it. It can be read as a stand alone book. As with any other Mellick book, I definitely recommend it to any bizarro/punk fan.

I loved The Haunted vagina,The Morbidly obese Ninja, Barbarian Beast Bitches of the Badlands, Werewolf women of the wastelands and Cannibals in Candyland. I'm 60 pages in and I feel it's a little slower than some of his other books but maybe I'm just impatient. Buy it. Check out Andersen Prunty as well.

Carlton Mellick III has written a pseudo-sequel to Satan Burger and it is amazing. We find ourselves in Punk Land which is punk heaven. Readers of Satan Burger will get little references from the book however, you can read this as a stand alone book and enjoy it completely. Mellick writes in his typical effortless way that never takes himself seriously. You come in contact with all your punk heroes from Sid Vicious to G.G. Allin. I don't want to get into the plot too much because I don't want to give anything away but trust me, Mellick touches on everything from the absurd to the philosophical. He even includes some awesome illustrations and diagrams along the way. The book is brilliant and deserves a read. Do yourself a favor and buy this book.

With Heaven Closed for Business other Heavens have opened run by the top Punk Acts of our times. And just as time does, these different levels have changed in Punk Heaven as it does on Earth itself. Leaders become Crazed and Corrupt with power and make these heavens no better then the times spent on Earth. But with a small band of newbies a sausagy mutated angel his angelic dildo and a Blue Mohawk Shark Woman things may just be a changing, only time will tell, but with the Amazingly Twisted Wit of Carlton Mellick III you just never know what may come about. This is a Awesome Read and a Very Cool Story. AAA+++

Where do people like GG Allin go when they die? Punk Land, of course. It's like heaven, except for punks. And some of those punks may have talking dildo babies. And some of those punks may actually be human-shark hybrid assassins. Basically, this is a rad concept made better by goofing around with punk culture and punk lore, and by adding in a helping of cool characters and their weird pets/babies.

A new breed of sci-fi known as 'bizarro-fiction,' which is odd and sometimes quite juvenile in its approach, but charming within that simplicity. The ideas are excellent and, well, bizarre, but well worth reading to at least say that you have sampled the genre. I plumped for this one as the model on the cover looked rather like a puckette I saw at a Motorhead gig at the Hammersmith Odeon.

This book is brilliant, and I thought one of his finest pieces to date. He really fleshes out the characters. I don't think he has surpassed this much in the years writing that followed.

Nice