The Book You Wish Your Parents Had Read: (And Your Children Will Be Glad That You Did)

I thought this book was superb but more than that, after about ten minutes I felt it was already changing my behaviour! My friend who recommended it said the same. Perry lays out her methods and thoughts very gently, with lots of good examples from real life, little case studies; but it’s the insights which really help. Looking at WHY we lose our rag about certain trigger bits of parenting - going back to our own childhoods and looking at why - OH MY GOD. Brilliant. There’s also so much help here about FIXING those situations once you as the parent have cocked up. Rupture / repair, as she puts it. And also advice on how to manage your parental situations better. When your kid says look at this, LOOK AT IT. I know that sounds sort of obvious but often I will say “hang on a sec I’m making dinner” etc. I feel like from now on I will do that differently because it doesn’t take two seconds to run and look. And the response you get is ♥️ I found it readable, funny, thoughtful, insightful, but most of all INCREDIBLY useful and, very very very rare for a book, genuinely life-changing.

I read a lot of self development books and no book has impacted and changed me the way this book has. Highly recommend for all current and upcoming parents. Also great if you're going through your own self discovery journey, our childhood holds the key to almost all our future behaviours. This will help you understand what your inner child needs and be able to offer it to yourself as an adult so you can heal too. It's written in a way that is incredibly easy to understand and take away what you have to do. I read on kindle and it was great.

I liked the book and I’m definitely taking advice from it, I’ve also recommended it to friends already. However I do feel it could be shorter by removing the repetition, at times I feel like I’ve read the same paragraph multiple times over. I’d also love to hear more examples of parents with multiple children, a lot of the examples were one child households, whereas many people have more

I want to start this review off by saying that I'm not much of a reader at all, I very rarely read books. But I have read all of this in about a month! I would recommend this book to anyone, parent or not. It's full of helpful and interesting tips and information and has actually helped me lots in understanding why I am the way I am due to my own upbringing. I'll keep hold of this book for when I have children of my own, I'm sure it will come in handy in any situation I'm not sure how to handle. One of the things I love most about it is that Philippa Perry doesn't try to make you feel bad about your past actions or mistakes you may have made with your kids, but instead she explains gently and in detail how to "repair ruptures" and how to be more empathetic and patient going forward. I honestly really struggled to put this book down, it was so interesting from start to finish. Amazing.

My first book on this subject and love it. Simply! Easy to read!

It's a really good book, and the advice is generally how I try to parent most of the time. I agree with pretty much all of it, and I confirmed a lot of my parenting practices. However, a lot of the advice seems to be written for a parent with one child. The examples often refer to one child situations/her own examples are of her and her daughter. For example if your child is having a meltdown or 'inconvenient behaviour ' in the street, she suggests just sitting with and validating your child's feelings/offering emotional support. Great, all really good stuff. Absolutely agree that's what you should do when your child is overwhelmed. But just not entirely practical for parents with two or more children. Especially if you have smaller children pulling in your arm of trying to wander off whilst you soothe your child who is having these big feelings. Worth reading and remembering the advice and aspiring towards it as much as possible. But don't let perfect be the enemy of good. We can't implement all of the advice ALL of the time. Perhaps needs more examples with more than one child. I find the most parenting support I need is when both of my children are displaying these 'inconvenient behaviours' at the same time in a time pressured environment such as being late for school etc.

This book became a comforting companion, written with such clarity and understanding that resonated deeply with my experiences as a parent. It effortlessly blends readability with valuable advice, delivered in a way that never feels judgmental. It's more than just a read; it's emotional, spiritual, and practical support for parents like me, regardless of their journey's stage. I even shared it with my mom to help bridge gaps in our relationship. Importantly, it opened my eyes to navigating the challenges with my junior son and husband, offering practical exercises I'm genuinely excited to incorporate into our lives.

I read an article by this lady while waiting to see the dentist and I immediately bought the book. My whole way of being a parent has changed. For over a month I have hardly lost my temper, shouted or shown irritation to my two boys. My boys have become calmer, more affectionate to each other as we as my husband and myself. My eldest has even improved at listening in class! I take deep breathes if I feel I’m getting cross with my boys and ask myself, ‘ is it worth it’ in turn when they get cross and angry I label their emotion, empathise and offer alternatives if they can’t get their way. I look forward to seeing them ALL the time. I miss them when there at school and when the weekends loom ahead with no plan in terms of what I do with my boys I just, go with it. One Saturday we did nothing but the love bomb, a day they decided on what to do: Lego, fancy dress, cooking. They went to bed happy. I can’t thank this writer enough for making me a better parent if also sadly realising again, how my own upbringing lacked real attention/ love. I’m determined to not repeat history and have my boys happy as much as I possibly can. All it took was time, patience and being calm. There is no need to punish children. By saying or showing there sorry is often enough. Discussing how they and you feel with them is helping them understand that life isn’t perfect but it’s how we deal with it, get through it. How I wish I had, had that lesson when I grew up.