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A**R
It will RADICALLY CHANGE YOUR MARRIAGE!!!!
Never a better book, except the Bible itself to help wives understand their husbands, or firgure out how to get along with whoever that mystery man is that you married especially if you feel you are in a state of disallutionment right now The knowledged gained here can even turn that disallutionment into an exciting, fun filled, communicating, love making, love receiving and giving, joy and laughter filed and heavenly marriage.I was a bit different in that I was happily married when a new friend recommended this book to me. She said it would "radically change" my marriage. I scoffed thinking what radical change could my marriage possibly need?Shortly into the book it asks you to write down 10 things you would like to see change in your marriage and it says to put the list inside the book for safe keeping to come back to later. I couldnt think of anything to list. I was happily married! Then as I read the book I began to realize that some of my behaviors and habits were keeping my husband from being all that I subconsciously wanted him to be. For exmple, I realized I was leading our home and deeply wanted him to lead. I was worn out from making all the decisions, all the final say so's and determining all the dicispline for the kids So I wrote down, 1. My husband to become the leader of our home. I also came to realize that I talked an awful lot and interupted my husband when he was speaking often. By doing this becasue he just shut down conversation with me. Even though I heard him talk alot with other people. I was not hearing from him. So, I wrote down #2 "I'd like to hear my husband talk more to me. I also realized I was very critical which hurt my husband. Yes, I wrote down, #3 "Me not be so critical toward my husband" I soon realized my critical ways were from being frustrated about #'s1&2.It took me months to read this book. Because the subject matter takes some time to sink in from each portion that you read. This is my second purchase of the book as I gave my first copy away. I also ordered the journal/workbook this time and yes, I'm reading it again. I spent about a year reading this book the first time, absorbing each part of it word by word. Laying it down and picking it back up. Wanting to rebel against the Biblical principals that meant I needed to grow or change my ways. I mean I thought my husband needed to change at this point. I was sure I was alread a good helpmeet. Maybe I did pocess some great qualitites of being a wife, God designed me to be my husband's helpmeet, his best friend, his confidant, to respect and admire him, to love and honor him in all that I do, so I persevered. I have not arrived at this perfected palce. I don't believe I will evver perfect it. But i am striving daily and lots of the changes I've made have been easy because they make so much sense to me. They are simple little things that make huge and at time complicated changes in my husband with out my saying a word to him about anything. Here a beautiful example...My husband new deep down that he should be the leader in our home, that I desired it too. But I said nothing about it during my reading. About 7 months into reading the book my husband who had been grappling with the Lord about this topic had a aha moment and told me he was convicted that he should be and would no begin to be the began leader of our home. The more I had seen him gappling the more I had stepped back. I didn't have confidence in him or anyone that they could do it as well as me. But as observed his actions and realized his ability and as I backed off he stepped in. He made what I would have called errors or mistakes sometimes doing things differently than I would have at first but I didn't say anything at all, look at him funny, roll my eyes or scoff. He had to learn. He had not example to follow from childhood, he had to learn how just like I had. Trial by fire. Now 6 months later he's the most amazing thing. He is doing things within our family I could not have touched the way he has, making a difference with the kids who needed an active father. Long ago tired of listening to mom. He asks me pretty often what do I think. Occasionally I put in a word or two cautious not to take over, many times I will simply say the truth, "You are the head of us and I trust you to make that decision and Im OK with that." What a Godly leader he is. I also stopped talking so much and started listening. I stopped asking him questions and then giving him my answer to the question with out listening to his answer. He tells me stories about his day, his life before me, his job, his youger years as a military bratt, what it was like raising his kids. I was 48 when I purchased my copy and at 49 I'm reading it a second time and using the journal to dig a bit deeper into my soul. My friend was exactly right. It has radically changed our marriage!!Titus 2 is the basis for this book. How to be a helpmeet to your husband, what it really means. How to win your husband by your behavior, not nagging, complaining or givng ultimatums. These promises have worked in thousands of marriages world wide and in our little home in the states. I only wish I had it sooner. It would have been a lot less painful journey together as a married couple. But were making up for lost time in a blisful joy filled and so happy marriage now. God bless you for reading my testimony and I pray you the courage to look yourself in the mirror of Titus 2 and the truths and promises in this book.
W**E
A MUST READ for ALL WIVES
This book is EXCELLENT, the most important one I've found so far in my search on marriage books. You have nothing to lose (only your unimproved marriage), only to gain an AWESOME marriage. If you truly want to be in the will of God as a wife, this is definitely the book for you. You have to read it with an open & honest heart before God that you want to be the best wife you can be. Thousands of marriages have been changed for the better AND more importantly thousands of people have been SAVED!! Especially unbelieving husbands just by the wife taking a step of obedience toward God in fulfilling her Godly role, not waiting for "him to shape up first before I change". Debi uses TONS of scripture, and has the fruit of her life to show. Not to mention the countless positive testimonies she receives from BOTH HUSBANDS & WIVES; lots are printed in this book and also printed in their newsletter. I'm sad to say that most of the women who talk negatively about this book are the ones who need it the most! They are convicted by the fact that they have been treating their husbands like children then wondering why they aren't being treated as a queen in return. Change is uncomfortable so they choose to continue in their ways and not listen to sound wisdom. Sadly, this causes tension in the home and negatively affects the children as well. If you're looking for a book to support the feminist movement, this is not for you. If you're looking for a book that will bring great joy & contentment to your marriage, then this is the perfect book. I have an amazing marriage and I want everyone else to be able to experience what I experience every day.I whole-heartedly disagree with the negative comments listed below in Jazzy Mama's review:-The text is written in a very prideful and arrogant manner.-DEBI IS SIMPLY DIRECT AND TO-THE-POINT, NO FLUFF ADDED-Scripture is often twisted and used out of context to support Mrs. Pearl's opinion.-SHE USES A TON OF SCRIPTURE FROM KJV WITH REFERENCES TO SUPPORT HER POINTS-The overarching theme is one of blame.-ABSOLUTELY NOT TRUE, SHE SIMPLY SAYS TO TAKE THE FIRST STEP, DON'T WAIT FOR YOUR HUSBAND TO CHANGE FIRST. ALSO THAT WE HAVE A MAJOR INFLUENCE ON THE TEMPERATURE OF OUR MARRIAGE & HOME WHETHER WE WANT TO ADMIT IT OR NOT.-The author uses the book to shamelessly promote her husband's books. It felt like a literary commercial at times.-NOT SURE WHERE THIS CAME FROM, NOT TRUE AGAIN. OF NOTE, THEY DO HAVE GREAT CHILD TRAINING BOOKS!-The author presents herself as knowing all there is to know of the male gender. -SHE SIMPLY SHARES THE WISDOM SHE HAS GATHERED IN HER MANY YEARS OF BEING A WIFE IN MINISTRY, ALSO HAS LOTS OF INSIGHT FROM HER HUSBAND TO SHARE TO SHED LIGHT FOR US ON THINGS WE MAY NOT REALIZE ABOUT MEN IN GENERAL.-The author presents her thoughts, interpretations and opinions as being the same as God's. DEBI SHARES HER VIEW ON SCRIPTURE/INTERPRETATION WHICH IS THE BEST ALL OF US CAN EVER DO. WE ALL HOPE TO MATCH GOD'S CHARACTER THE BEST POSSIBLE!-A man's moral failings (as a husband and father) are presented as being the fault of his wife. ABSOLUTELY NOT TRUE, SHE DOES TALK ABOUT THINGS LIKE WE CAN DRIVE OUR HUSBANDS AWAY BY OUR ATTITUDES/WORDS/ACTIONS AND THAT IS WHAT SHE IS FOCUSING ON IN THIS BOOK TO WOMEN. THIS BOOK IS NOT WRITTEN TO MEN AND SHE DOES REPEATEDLY STATE THAT A MAN IS NOT OFF THE HOOK FOR ADULTERY, ETC JUST BECAUSE HIS WIFE ISN'T PERFECT. JUST WHAT THINGS COULD WE HAVE DONE TO ENCOURAGE HIM IN THAT SIN BY DRIVING HIM AWAY AND HOW TO START ACTING IN WAYS TO DRAW HIM TO US. SHE SIMPLY ADDRESSES WHAT WE, AS WIVES, CAN DO TO HELP THE MARRIAGE AND THAT THE HUSBAND IS SUBJECT TO GOD FOR ALL OF HIS OWN ACTIONS, ETC.I hope every woman will take the time to read this book-it's easy reading and difficult to put down. Yes, it is convicting at times. But read it with the scripture "Search me O God" in mind. Do you want to move closer to God in your marriage or not? Do you want to have an awesome marriage or not? Ask Him to reveal His word to you through this book. She is not at all telling wives to be an abused door-mat or brainwashed. This book will empower you to have a glorious, fulfilling marriage. Blessings to you all!!
V**A
A good and proper reality check
I’d recommend this book to wives who have been overbearing and controlling in their relationship with their husbands. Some of these Biblical principles we know intellectually but to know them in the heart is something different. The author does a fantastic job of putting things into proper perspective and thus helping the reader to get into their proper place within the marriage. As former feminist pagan who has since converted to Catholicism I can say this book has helped me immensely!
L**A
LIFE CHANGING!
Mr & Mrs Pearl truly are GOD SENT! Their books have truly opened my eyes and taught me so much. I am not a wife yet, but I surely do desire to be. Their books truly do help prepare you to be a pleasing wife, or how to improve,not only to your man, but to our King.....I also appreciate how scripture is the main foundation and not opinion.Whoever reads their books WILL be transformed!
A**G
Great book for every Christian woman
This book is a great resource. I’m grateful I am reading it before getting married but I’m sure I will need to re read it may times when married. I love the different types of men and practical ways to be a good wife depending on what type of Husband you have. The book Created to need a helpmeet is also great as it gives insight into the mind of a man. I hope to gift that book to my future Husband one day. It is biblically based with scripture throughout.
A**E
very powerful book
This book has the power to change very bad marriages, even if only the wife is dedicated to this goal. It makes clear what the responsibility of the wife is and what not and through this can be very liberating for the wife! The whole message is based on the Bible and Gods plan revealed in it. Love it very much, read it 10 times!
M**X
Life-Changing
You have to read this. You will never be the same again. I pray God opens your heart to hear the truths of His Word and Design.
M**I
Old version but great book
I Received an old version of the book. But The book itself is great, must read for all women who trust in the Lord
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