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V**3
Excellent book! Do not be deterred by negative reviews!
I almost didn't purchase this book because of some of the awful reviews I read. I questioned whether I wanted to waste my time and money on something that some reviewers claimed advocates child abuse. So I began with the free sample, was pleased and decided to purchase it. After reading this book in it's entirety I am absolutely shocked at some of the awful things people wrote about this author! Dobson's advice is far from abusive and I worry about a society so permissive that it would label it as such. He stresses the importance of protecting the spirit of the child while helping to control the will. He warns against discipline that is demeaning or done in anger. He gives advice for creating a home filled with love and how to discipline a difficult child while making it evident to the child that they are loved, special, and cared for. Dobson stresses the importance if finding a balance between a household that is too harsh and too permissive as both ends of the spectrum can be harmful to a child. He does advocate swatting a child on the behind one or two times for clear acts of defiance and only after other measures have failed. He writes that spankings should be rare, never done in anger, and always followed by holding the child and lovingly telling them what they did wrong and assuring them that they are loved. However, if you disagree with spanking this book can still be beneficial to you. It is filled with an abundance of helpful information, most of which has nothing to do with spanking. Read it and take away what is useful for your situation and toss what isn't. If you have a strong willed child then I think you'll find it very beneficial!
M**N
I knew it but my wife really needed this
If you have a wonderful girly-girl wife but your child is hell-on-wheels, this may bring her down to earth. It's a nice reality check, especially if you are getting advice from modern therapists... fortunately she didn't let me dismiss them because they provided some excellent insights, but frankly they don't know your child or ours and shouldn't hold themselves out as more than advice-givers.The News in this book was a shock to my wife, who is sugar-and-spice. I knew our boy was all about winning at his games from birth because I was the same way and even after 50 years (yes, we're old for first-time parents) I remember all to well tormenting my mother who was essentially sugar-and-spice as well. But had I been any different, I would have been clueless. If you are reading this you have a sense of what I am writing about.Buy it, read it, and believe it. If you are inclined, skim over the Fundamentalist Christian sounding parts but do not be deterred - this is the real thing and will tell you like it is. We're half-inclined to begin the laying-on-hands though (I'm being half-facetious here) us Catholics don't go for that sort of thing and t was not necessary. Believe me, I pray every hour I'm with our little hellion.I believe that this book and Dr. Dobson have been inspired by God. It spoke to us - to me as someone with knowledge but no idea how to use it and to my wife as something completely new. Dr. Dobson has transcended time and geography to speak in two different languages at the same time to two very different people, to help us make good choices raising our very disturbed "normal" little Strong Willed boy. That's the kind of miracle I can believe in. This book was God-sent, and from my post here you can get the idea that I'm not prone to religious hyperbole.
S**S
Must read for parents and a FAR cry from child abuse!
This is an amazing book for any parent struggling with a strong willed child. Dr Dobson is a great help and has much wisdom to share on this topic! Despite what the previous reviewer says (I am doubtful that she read the book) this is the opposite of child abuse. She seems to wrongly assume that any time a parent spanks a child that they are "out of control". Dr Dobson strongly states in this book that a parent should NEVER spank a child in anger. It's almost as if she has some sort of axe to grind and is giving an unfair and illogical review of this wonderful book. Dr Dobson has been a champion of children and families for decades and helps parents know how to have healthy boundries and fair boundries for their children. Sometimes "love must be tough" to be effective and to keep a child safe from his own destructive behavior... The idea that any form of spanking is child abuse is ridiculas at best and ignorant at worst. The key is to spank only when the child has directly disobeyed and to NEVER do it in anger, which is what Dr Dobson carefully explains. This type of spanking is NOT "out of control" and is always followed up by affection and reconcilliation between the parent and child...Dr Dobson helps parents know how to deal with a strong willed child so that they do not lose control but still have boundries and structure in the home. I think the previous reviewer who says she is the wife of a Pediatrician must not have had any strong willed children in her own household...Her recommendations would not "fly" with this type of personality. There are MANY parents that will attest to the fact that "time out" does not work with their strong willed child. If a strong-willed child feels that they control the home and dont have to obey authority, they grow up to be self indulgent and disliked by all and their future will be severly affected...This is just as much child abuse as someone who spanks out of control...There is a BIG difference between "spanking" and "hitting". She incorrectly assumes they are one and the same. Dr Dobson will teach you the difference in this important book! I also highly recommend his book called "Dare To Discipline" for those struggling with parenting. Dr Dobson is a God send in todays permissive culture!
R**A
Great Read
Very informative, easy reading
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